I'm SO tired. Funny thing is, I can't sleep. Josh and I stay up late talking, then kids wake me up between 6:30 and 7. If I'm lucky I get a bit more sleep after that, but not good, restful sleep. Let alone getting up twice in the night to release the flood created so quickly in my bladder. It's crazy. I try to nap every day, but stress makes those minutes of sleep short and frustrating. IF I do start a good nap, it's awakened by a crazy thought of being late to pick up the boys from school. WHY CAN'T EVERYONE LEAVE ME ALONE TO SLEEP!
I finally got nauseated too. One day Kaden and I shared a bowl of expired chicken noodle soup. I figured it'd be fine. Well, when I was standing over the toilet telling Kaden to leave the bathroom cause he didn't want to watch his mommy throw up, I had to wonder. In the end, I didn't; I have a stomach of steel. I have had my share of blah since then. I eat a lot, and/or often during the day, so I don't have much of a problem until night. We eat dinner, during which I gorge myself (not good), so I don't feel hungry again until just before I want to go to bed. I eat a little something, but it doesn't hold me over until I fall asleep after 10:30 or 11, so I feel gross.
I got really sick just yesterday because I went two hours without eating and had been painting the whole time. I'm a pansy. But hey, if that means no sickness, I'll eat.
Now that I'm actually hungry and HAVE to eat...I do it a little too well. I say every day I'll work on it, but I end up eating cake, making banana bread, cooking up cinnamon rolls that have been in our fridge for 6 months, AND have a few bites of ice cream in one day...yeah, my thighs are NOT size 6 anymore and I'm NOT happy with my lack of self control.
Dang, food tastes good.
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First of all congratulations!!! I was wondering if you were. I know how you feel. That being said, I don't think it is a matter of self control I think it is a desire to, if only for a moment, feel normal. As for already gaining 10 lbs you sound like me but I am jealous that you started at 140 and started at 170. Being smaller even if you gain 40 or 50 lbs you will only end at 190 at the most. Me I hate to admit am pushing the 220's so be grateful you only will have to lose 50 instead of 80 or 90 at the end. I doubt you will gain that much though. I guess I just need to call you and chat. My thoughts aren't making much sense here. Good luck!!
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